Why I Didn't Drink Last night

The power of suggestion is strong.

I had three, count 'em three, therapy session this week. Monday with my hubby to visit his therapist, Tuesday with my own, and Wednesday with our marriage counselor.

Monday and Tuesday were rough, and Tuesday night my husband was "talking me down off the ledge" so to speak. By Wednesday I had my head straighter and we eased up on any tough stuff and just had a mellow session, because that was about all I could take.

My therapist, on Tuesday, asked me what I was going to do to reward myself after three days of serious introspection. She suggested I do something to honor myself Wednesday. She said, what are you going to do besides get loaded?

Damnit! The thing is....I wasn't even thinking about drinking until she said it. Then I couldn't get it out of my head all day yesterday!

It is a reward system for me. I used drinking that way for many years. Exams over? Have a drink. End of the work day? Drink. Did I clean the whole house? Do laundry and dishes? Drink. Yard work? Remodeling project? Have a drink. Relax. You did a lot of stuff, you deserve it.

Having three days of intense therapy sessions is NOT a good reason to drink. In fact it would undo everything that had been done, correct? Unravel it?

I went about my day yesterday after therapy with a small voice in the back of my head: stay sober. I was good to myself by finally starting a project that is long overdue. I started framing some paintings, a chore that stumps me over and over again. I got down in that dank basement and cleaned up a bit and just got to work. I am going to commit to working on these things every Wednesday until they are all framed, now that it's not 39 degrees in the basement any longer.

I was good to myself by taking a walk with hubby to the bookstore and getting some new books. I was good to myself by eating a fine dinner prepared by someone else and brought home in a box. I was good to myself by taking my vitamins and settling down in front of the TV to watch basketball, without a drink in my hand. I took a long hot shower during halftime and was in bed with a new book by 9:30pm.

My reward was staying sober. For today, I am up early and feeling refreshed and ready to face another day.